Book Review: Lean In

Lean in

Success is making the best choices we can and accepting them

-         - Sheryl Sandberg

A new trend common these days is bracketing behaviour as feminist and non-feminist. One cannot speak of gender equality without falling into either of these classifications. And when a book comes out that directly attacks the sensitive area of “women empowerment” it is bound to be branded sexist/feminist and put into a shelf screaming out the same. After Sheryl Sandberg, the current COO of Facebook gave out a stately TED talk that has been viewed more than 2 million times, she set out to write a book on the same lines.

In a world that has less than 4% of women in the leadership positions of fortune 500 companies, Sheryl posits that we need more women at the top to ensure the empowerment of women and for this purpose she has chalked out various guidelines and suggestions for both men and women. I believe it cannot be called a manifesto per se, but can serve as a wonderful insight into the thought process of a successful woman.

Sheryl has been openly bashed for being brave and calling out for measures to bridge the gender inequality. Whenever a successful (or in most cases slightly successful) man comes up with a self-help book he is much lauded for his willingness to help the world. When a successful woman genuinely tries to pull other women ahead with her, what is the need to term her efforts as sexist and pretentious? Although the book may not be considered a literary brilliance, I stand by Sheryl’s philosophy mentioned in the book of getting more women at the top.

Now reflecting on the contents of the book, I would say be your own judge and take only those suggestions that are apt for your socio-economic conditions. Sheryl quotes brilliant anecdotes and often comes across as a warm and vulnerable person. Reading the book is thrilling for one it has life snippets of famous and powerful people and second it convincingly drives home the fact that every other person in the world has familial and careerist problems. Sheryl often supports her claims through statistics, research studies and personal experience.

Sheryl tells the readers how she and many other top notch working women handle family and work. I loved it when she made a point how work-life balance is itself a funny concept and how one cannot separate work from life. If you treat your work as a separate entity apart from your life then probably you are not working in a job you love. Sheryl assumes a type of problem-solving approach most leaders use - that of sharing her experience during problematic times. This makes the book easily readable and to attract the connectivity with the reader.

One thing that could be better in the book is the sloppy transition to universal sentiments. Sheryl usually talks about a certain approach throughout a chapter and then suddenly at the end of the chapter she declares that she believes in the age-old wisdom and the alternate approach is also equally right. This incoherent transition has rendered the ending of many chapters unimpressive.

I recommend this book to those who have the habit of catching up with the latest sensations of the literary world and to those who love the typical Harvard alums way of writing a persuasive book (FYI: Sheryl is a Harvard alumna). This book having less than 200 pages is a breezy read and has the contribution and time of many talented persons as is evident from the acknowledgement section. Career loving parents (read working moms in popular lingo) should definitely try this out. 

Story begins!

I learnt the art of story telling from my mom who is till today a very descriptive and animated life story teller. I grew up and am still leading my life listening to her stories of her own childhood, people and relationships in her life, struggles and victories of her life. Today I wanna share a story that humbled me the most.

There are kids coming from low income families to my class in summer school. One such kid is Mahesh and he is one of the most sincere and intelligent kids I have seen. He is a fast learner and a fantastic dancer who does locking, popping, rock and roll and many other forms of dancing. I had a chance to visit the community he lives in and the things I saw there amused me.

• Mahesh had studied in a dilapidated Telugu medium school in a remote village of Andhra Pradesh. He has been in Pune English school for only an year. What's admirable is that he has learnt Hindi and English to conversational level in just less than an year.
• Mahesh's parents are 100% illiterates and that hasn't stopped him from succeeding in academics. Mahesh bagged A2 grade, which corresponds to 81-90%  in 5th standard exams - this being without any kind of help with studies at his home.
• Mahesh lives in servant quarters in a 10*10 square feet single room sharing the space with 3 other people of his family.

The above facts are just highlights of Mahesh's intellect while there are so many other things to be considered. He is a very curious child who is sincere and always ready to help his classmates. This boy displays tremendous amount of self-confidence and learns quickly. He draws inspiration from the successful people around him and aspires to become an army doctor.

I set out to teach him but now I realize he is already inspired from deep within his heart. I can learn from him and look back into my memories and fondly remember this kid from my first ever classroom. The world is too quick in forming biases about the low income communities but I believe they are no different from others, all they need is opportunities.

You have to grow from the inside out. None can teach you, none can make you spiritual. There is no other teacher but your own soul.

- Swami Vivekananda

Why Teach For India

You have heard me speak about dreams and passion in my articles and hope is the tone of most of the books and blogs I read. Now you would ask what's the use of reading so much! Is it just to write about them?

NO.

During the past two years of my life I broke out of the cocoon and started practising the most important advantage of living - taking my important decisions without being flown away by other people's influence. I read books, travelled (in my own limits) and spoke to many people just so to draw the courage to declare my decision. I moulded my thinking so as to muster courage to articulate my dreams. This is the path I set out to enter the path of education sector and being a change agent in our society:

Initial thinking:
I always knew deep in my heart that IT industry was not my cup of tea. I choose to do engineering at an age where I was not emotionally strong enough to fight for my choice. I lacked the maturity to understand myself and as does happen with most other middle class youngsters, I too ended up in an engineering college. I do not say I hated my subjects but I couldn't imagine being in that field for a lifetime. Sixth semester was when I decided I would quit the field of electronics and communication. Although I had a GPA of 9.0/10.0 which is a very high standard to qualify as a good engineer, I did not provide the field any justice. For the sake of electronic industry and myself, I quit being a mediocre engineer and continued to dream of another career.

First step:
I got into one of the big four consulting companies (owing to my very good communication skills and aptitude although definitely not because of my electronics knowledge) and decided to stay put there until I could define my dream perfectly.

It hurt my conscience many a times that I am not doing 100% justice to my job. I convinced myself that it is okay to be on the wrong path for a while if that path joins the bigger path you wish to be on. As Steve Jobs said in his Stanford speech, one can connect the dots looking backwards not forwards. This has been true with my case since my stint with consulting gave me friends, resources and time needed for self-introspection. I had nothing to lose but a lot to gain.

I understood that since childhood education has been very dear to me. If I can do something relentlessly forever then it's got to be issues related to education. I applied and got offers from 3 foreign universities for an MBA in social entrepreneurship, two with scholarships upto 15 lacs INR. I got offers from two prestigious fellowships in India, one being Teach For India(TFI). There! I had many tickets to enter the field of social service in education.

Why I do what I chose?
 After a lot of thinking, I took an informed decision of joining TFI movement. TFI is a perfect fit for my ambitions because

• TFI has restored the honour into the lustre lost old profession of teaching. Here I do not have to teach but I must transform my kids' lives. There are hundreds who have already done that. Thousands of kids came out of poverty, abuse and negligence to have a normal chance at living because of TFI. 
• TFI provides idealistic youngsters like me an opportunity to combat the educational inequity crisis in our nation heads on. 
• TFI is a leadership movement. I can learn more things in this fellowship than I could learn being at any other place. 
• TFI has put me amidst a bunch of high achievers who have jumped into the bandwagon of eradicating poor quality education. Your success is decided by the people you work with and I am completely convinced that I can grow as a tremendous leader embodying patience, humility and a sense of possibility. 
• TFI has created a structure where every single person involved is welcome to grow and achieve excellence irrespective of whether  is s/he a student, staff or fellow. 
• TFI is an organisation where leaders truly inspire juniors and they all speak a single language of hope and service.
• TFI folks taught me the spelling of coolness.
  
  Here is one of the lot to redefine hope:
  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a8S2HLDcQug

Journey and the future

In the next two years of TFI fellowship, I will be responsible for the lives of 40+ kids and it is my capability that their future depends on. Teaching a kid with life lessons is a challenge and I am confident that I am equipped to take up that challenge 40 times over in two years. The curriculum will be like nothing seen before, the methods completely innovative and the love entirely infinite. I will be provided the support system of TFI staff at every step I stumble and it is my responsibility along with fellow cohorts to transform the kids' lives for better. 

The future holds nothing but hopes for my kids. I have met children from low income societies who have transcended all limitations of society because of the excellent education and love they have received from past fellows. I have made a promise to myself that I would work humbly in every way to transform the life of as many kids as possible through education. 

Somebody has to go polish the stars,

They’re looking a little bit dull.

Somebody has to go polish the stars,

For the eagles and starlings and gulls

Have all been complaining they’re tarnished and worn,

They say they want new ones we cannot afford.

So please get your rags

And your polishing jars,

Somebody has to go polish the stars.

-Shel Sliverstein

I can speak volumes about how TFI has changed me in such a little time. One incidence worth mentioning is how my perception of gentleness and love changed. Never in my life did I pet an animal before. But today I wanted to hold a puppy and talk to him for a minute. For a person who has never been closer than 1ft to an animal this is a great feat. It shows about the power of the nurturing environment I am in. I hope to change, I hope to transform myself and the society.

It is time for parents to teach young people early on that in diversity there is beauty and there is strength.

-Maya Angelou 

Book review: The diary of a young girl

Often I come across a book that is in itself a boring read but triggers a series of events making me more knowledgeable. "The diary of a young girl" by Anne Frank is one such book which bored me with rants of a young adolescent but the one which made me read tens of stories about World Wars, Nazi atrocity, holocaust, cruelty of Jew extermination camps and led me to interesting conversations with other enthusiasts. I am now better exposed to the topic of Hitler than I was earlier. This unexpected stumbling on a reservoir of stories and facts forms the definition of a good book.

The book is a diary as the title suggests of a young girl, Anne Frank who goes into hiding with 7 other Jews during the German occupation of Netherlands. Anne receives a diary as a birthday present on her 13th year from her father, just two days before going into hiding. She writes all her letters to an imaginary friend called 'Kitty' and speaks on a gamut of emotions such as her shock from going into hiding, her growing sexuality, her troubled relationship with her mother, her identity crisis as an adolescent, her routine in the 'Secret Annexe' (the name of their hiding place as given by Anne), her views on the ongoing of second World War, her dreams post-war et al.

The writing style is that of a typical diary (translated from the original manuscript in Dutch) and the reader finds description of mundane routines of the hiding members. The horrors faced by a family in hiding is written in a matter-of-factly manner. The reader gets to see the intensifying and simultaneously confusing emotions of an adolescent and anybody can relate with Anne's emotions of a teenager. There is a glimpse of Dutch and Jewish culture to relish. It is heart wrenching to read the fate of all those 8 members of the 'Secret Annexe' once they were found by the Nazi gestapo officers. An elaborate description of Anne's life can be read here: http://www.sensibud.com/index.php/anne-frank-house. Of all the 8 Jew victims who were arrested, only Anne's father Otto Frank survived the extermination camp by a sliver of good luck since the war ended just when he was about to be executed. Once out of his living hell, Otto comes back to collect whatever was left in the 'Secret Annexe' only to find his daughter's diary. After removing explicit sexual contents of his daughter and vile description of his wife's character by Anne, Otto published the diary for the whole world to read. Till date this book is the most acclaimed account of a Nazi victim's life and Anne has come to represent the six million Jews who were executed in the holocaust.

Here is a movie that does brilliant justice to Anne's diary: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4fPsohTTxwY. The sickness of Nazi treatment to Jews is very well depicted in the movie. I was appalled, disgusted and angered by a particular scene where a family member had to poop in a trashcan since she wasn't allowed to leave the common room while a potential threat occurred to the safety of hiding. 

While the book and the following research about holocaust was intellectually enriching, I was angered beyond expression on the cruelty over Jews worldwide. The pacifist in me was awakened and I came to the conclusion that all and any war serves no purpose to humanity. Probably I need a very strong reason to again believe in the necessity of a war. The read was very slow and I had to rush through many sections where the detailing got very dull and repetitious. This was one of the books I forced myself to finish. 

I recommend this book because:

• humanity owes Nazi victims' a simple honor of their stories being heard
• this book will enable further reading on related topics
• the reader will get to know Nazi atrocities first hand

"What is truth? It is what you choose to believe"
- Jeet Thayil

Hitler's truth cost the lives of 6 million Jews. DON'T ever believe in a truth that costs the lives of millions. 

Further reading:
To give my readers a glimpse of madness that had struck humanity during second World War, here is a story of a doctor who tortured innocent children akin to lab rats:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Josef_Mengele.
 Do read all the hyperlinks in the link above to realize the horror of one man's obsession with murder.

Old read with a new perspective

The Alchemist

"The Alchemist is a beautiful book about magic, dreams and the treasures we seek elsewhere and then end on our doorstep"
Madonna

The above line captures the entire analysis of this book, "The Alchemist" in a simple sentence and I admit that I have nothing more to add to the review. Instead I am going to share with you my reading experience of Alchemist for the second time.

I read this book about 6 years ago when I just wanted to be done with reading a famous book in the must-read book list. Although I was impressed by the book, it was a mere story for me. I had failed to assimilate the philosophy into my life. But in the past 6 years I have matured enough to understand as well as adapt Paulo Coelho's philosophy. This book is by a man who struggled hard to practice non-conformity (one of my current favorite human capabilities) throughout his life. This unassuming 156 page book is a profound philosophy in the form of a treasure hunt story. The boy Santiago breaks all chains of social conventions and leads a life he wanted to lead-a life of travelling and learning. Believing a dream to be a prophecy to be fulfilled, Santiago sets out to find a hidden treasure in the pyramids of Egypt. The journey exposes him to theft, fear, war, love and ultimate realization of human capacity.

I reread this book at a stage when I am at the crossroads in life under an obligation to either choose my dream or to stick to social conventions and expectations. Anyone who reads this book is humbled to listen to one's own heart, choose the dreams which are the most important to oneself and search for love that only expects you to achieve your best. The book upholds the simple human truth that when you run behind your dream, every piece fits into the puzzle naturally and the whole world begins to make better sense. The simple facts of life highlighted in the book:

• dreams are wonders not to be ignored
• there is no reason why one shouldn't follow one's dream
• learn to recognize the pattern of how every act of yours renders you closer to the dream
• to avoid working towards a dream fulfillment provides only ephemeral peace while it is in realizing a dream that one truly find happiness

Read this book 

if you have a spark in your soul that's waiting to burn

if you need to know how great things are done

if you wanna sweat for success in return

Choose a life that will make you happy. 

As with all matters of life, you will know when you find it.

-Steve Jobs

How Draupadi wasted precious 2 days of my life!

One tale that India doesn't get tired of retelling is Mahabharatha. Story tellers across all genres, regions, languages and religions have adopted the main Vyasa story into their narration and rendered the epic in various flavours for the common men to relish. The themes of family fights, wars, politics, miracles and morals in Mahabharatha have found multicolored illustrations in stories. The palace of illusions is yet another feeble attempt at narrating the Mahabharatha epic from a different perspective. Chitra Banerjee Divakaruni has chosen Draupadi as the narrator and it is through her eyes that we see the Mahabharatha unfold.

The novel begins with a rather dull rant from Draupadi about how she sprang into life from the fire along with her brother Drushtadyumna and on she goes to grumble about her inconsequential existence amidst the palace walls. She desperately waits for her turn to fulfill the prophecy of her life-the prophecy which she states would alter the history of Bharat land. Draupadi as is shown in the book is a stupid and trivial selfish person who cribs for half of the book. A new angle seen in the book is that Draupadi has a longing to marry the tragic hero of Mahabharatha-Karna.

* To recount a story I heard from an elder at home I take a small break from my review. Draupadi in her past life was a sage's wife who suffered from tuberculosis. Being the pativrate that she was (all women in our epics are victims of domestic subjugation), she was in the habit of eating out of her husband's leftover plate. Once while doing so, she sees a rotten finger of her TB suffering husband. Alas! she eats the entire meal along with the finger without complaining. After his death some time later, she goes into Shiva Tapasya. Pleased by her Tapasya, Lord Shiva appears before her to grant a wish. On seeing the Lord, the ecstatic Draupadi prays him to grant a better husband in the next life by chanting "Patim dehi" for five times and when she is about to say it for the sixth time and utters "Pati" the Lord stops her and gladly grants the wish. So in the next life Draupadi gets 5 husbands (for chanting Patim dehi 5 times) and also comes too close to marrying another one (for the half "Pati" chant) Karna. *

The other half of the book goes in the obnoxious queen Draupadi detailing various events and their bad outcomes tarnishing her reputation, mood and happiness. Our miss annoying queen dedicates sufficient part of the narration to picture her friendship with Krishna and how her tiny pea sized brain fails to decipher such a great person's character. The only part which holds a reader's interest is the Kurukshetra war description and no surprise in that because the events that unfolded in 18 day epic war are worth anybody's attention no matter who tells the story.

This pesky book would have been a bit more bearable if only it had some profound thought worthy philosophy in it. I agree that Mahabharatha has been rarely told from a woman's perspective but the hype ends at just that fact. You part with the book with a dismal feeling that Draupadi was a waste of space on earth!! A beautiful moral story of Mahabharatha is reduced to sluggish jabber of a silly female.

People who should stay away from this book are those:

• who think that a character like that of Draupadi cannot be lame.
• who have heard wonderful Mahabharatha stories from grandparents, mothers et al.
• who have relished reading thoughtful versions of Mahabharatha.
• who know the difference between a cribbing selfish girl and a woman of substance.

People who should read this book are those:

• who wish to have a good laugh about a wretched version of a great epic.
• who want to warn their friends what books not to read.

If you really want to read a wonderful retelling of Mahabharatha from human point of view then get yourself a copy of "Parva" from S.L.Bhyrappa. 

Quirky facts about Dr.Albert Einstein

All right! Going by the title of the post you might have come here looking for stupendous-man (refer to my dear Calvin's stupendous definitions here) like traits of the greatest intellect of 21st century Einstein.  I am not going to tell things like "Einstein was super human that he never farted in company" and neither that "Einstein ran a secret brotherhood to preserve the mysteries of Jesus Christ", instead I am going to share little somethings from his ordinary life that I picked up from reading this book from Walter Issacson.

• Einstein was ever forgetful. We all know the tale where he called up Princeton University office to note down his own home address. He would forget keys, leave behind his precious things and often travel to places far away only to realize he doesn't have any clothes with him.
  
• Einstein's brain was stolen post his autopsy and evaded from being caught for almost 3 decades after his death. There is also a movie "Relics" dedicated to this story line.
  
• Einstein was not mean to his wife. He treated only one of his wife badly :P In order to persuade her to divorce him he lured her with his Nobel prize money.
  
  An excerpt from Einstein's letter to his second wife (when they were still not married yet):
  "I treat my wife as an employee I can't fire"
  
• Einstein ran away from Germany and never returned in fear and disgust for the Nazi rule. (Einstein was a Jew by birth and he was never in terms with his religion as a young man. In the later part of his life he strongly associated his kinship with the troubled Jews and fought for their pride and honor).
  
• Einstein was offered the presidency of the newly formed state Israel in 1952 which he rejected promptly for he himself knew very well that he would make a lousy politician.
  
• Einstein never got convinced of the path breaking Heisenberg theories which revolutionized Quantum physics. Neither was he convinced of the uncertainty principle nor did he appreciate or approve of the scientific leaps in particle physics. Einstein died a death of non-quantum physics believer.
  
• Einstein was a seasoned violinist and connected deeply with music. He often played on his violin in place of giving a speech. I often wonder that music is the language of universe and it seems to attract every human!!Poor, rich, dumb, bright - music has a spell on everyone.
  
  
  
  

I revelled in reading this piece by Issacson and convinced beyond doubts that he is a wonderful story teller. I recommend this book to anyone who is

• interested in knowing all the dimensions of Einstein's life
• eager to know the path breaking scientific discoveries of early 21st century

We often think that success, knowledge and social life can't go hand in hand but when we delve deep into celebrities' lives we realize how mistaken we are and how limited our thinking is. Science and art can revolutionize how we live our lives. A thought insignificant at first can sweep the entire mood of the society. Einstein's scientific contributions did not just create a new chapter of modern physics but his theory of relativity based on non-conformist ideals brought forth an era of new art opposing all norms of conventional thinking. His attitude made many an old league of classical physicists to look in awe and inspired a cadre of youngsters to cross the limit of his capabilities. Einstein lived during a time rather created a time where the field of theoretical physics donned an attire of freshness and creative geniuses of that time sprung to life. Knowing Einstein's life is synonymous to getting a sneak peak into the movement of theoretical physics renewal.